I should get a shirt like this. It's true, I LOVE FOOD. I love buying it, I love making it, and I love eating it. Especially the part that involves dishes and soap. Yeah, washing dishes really isn't my thing. I am yet to meet anyone who actually enjoys doing that. But I still haven't met anyone who doesn't love food, in one way or another. 

Here's my love story:

I. The Beginning

We've all heard of pregnancy cravings, right? If you haven't they're pretty self-explanatory. Pregnant women start craving certain foods and combinations. Some go crazy with nut butters and crackers, some go crazy with Ben & Jerry's, or Cups Of Noodles, or overly sweet food, or salty or spicy or really anything. Sometimes really weird stuff. On 60 Minutes, for example, Beyonce said that the tabloids were spreading rumors she liked eating bananas with spicy stuff or something. 

Anyways, back to the story,  when my mom was pregnant with me she started craving chocolate-covered marshmallows. I like to think that's why I have such a sweet tooth. There is not enough chocolate in the world to repulse me. Better yet, there's little chance that I will not eat any candy you offer me. Unless you are a perv that offers doped candy. 

But the pregnancy cravings still don't come anywhere near the reason I love food (in general) so much. All of the women in my family are fantastic cooks. I was born and raised (up until the age of 11) in the wonderful country of Colombia. I swear this will make sense, just stick with me. Colombian food is some of the best food in the entire planet (not that I have tried every single cuisine in the planet...), hence the fantastic cooking skills that run in my family/heritage. Both of my grandmothers make the most fabulous food. It is very homey, and flavorful and simply heavenly.

Then my mother who can literally whip up dishes in a matter of minutes with the weirdest ingredients. One time, for example, she didn't realize we didn't have pasta sauce until after she had made the spaghetti, so she sauteed some shrimp in olive oil with scallops. Then she served them on the spaghetti with chopped almonds. It was heavenly. Even with the almonds, which I found surprising because I'm not terribly fond of nuts unless they're a) salted peanuts or b) Nut butters.  Also, she makes a killer lasagna. Her ricotta recipe (Sorrento Ricotta, eggs, oregano and her secret ingredient!) is the best.  If she made her own ricotta, like the awesome Mary Jo Deschanel (I happen to know that... not creepy at all...), I can guarantee it would be the most heavenly ricotta ever. 

This leads me to...

II. First Sight

I remember being young, maybe like six or seven years old, when I first asked my grandmother to help me bake a cake. It might have been because I had been watching the home-cooking channel earlier, but I wanted to try. And try we did. Since I was young, I obviously had help, so it should come as no surprise that it was good. We baked a lot after that... and suddenly, by eight or nine I was making them almost by myself. And they were good (or so I was told. There really is no way to know... for reasons that will be later addressed...). 

III. First Love

We watch a lot of Food Network. There have been times when all we watch is Iron Chef America or the FN Challenges, which are awesome. Also, we watched Good Eats a lot. I mean, Alton Brown is just the coolest cat (I did just say that...) out there. And Bobby Flay. AND DUFF GOLDMAN. These guys are amazing. In case you don't know who Duff is... a) where have you been? and b) GOOGLE. Or look underneath:

Alton Brown is the smartest, most amusing and insightful person. He also complicates his recipes a lot, but they're good. Super good. And his cookbooks are very clever. And witty.

 I don't even know where to begin with this. I mean, it's Duff Goldman we're talking about here. He has won SO many Food Network Challenges. He owns the most awesome cake shop ever. (Remind me to write a post about the time I made my mom drive me to Baltimore to see it...). They make the most unreal cakes ever. Doctor Who's TARDIS? The Hogwarts Castle? A little plane thing for St. Jude's Hospital? a Wiener Dog? a Pinto? YODA? R2D2? I could just keep going on. Forever and Ever and Ever. Of course, his team is a big part of it too, but I can't crush on all of them, can I? 

Also, for Christmas I tweeted him a picture of my not-so-pretty red velvet cake, and he said it looked like a nice carrot pizza cake. 

Bobby Flay is The Iron Chef. I've never seen him get beat. That and the fact that he's so totally bad-ass on Throwdown with Bobby Flay... it actually is kinda funny. 

But he's epic.

 (BAck to the story...) This Food Network love affair was only intensified when we watched one of the most fantastic movies ever: Julie & Julia.  Meryl Streep turned  a somewhat terrifying person (I kid you not, the Real Julia scares me.) into the grandmotherly type of woman you just NEED to cook with. Check her [the Real Julia!] out making ommelettes. YUMM!!

I was deeply saddened when she didn't like Julie Powell's endeavors. At least Julie's Julia did!! (Let's all be happy because our Imaginary friends love us!!).

IV. The End (of this post)

Sadly, I have to end this post. But the story doesn't quite end there... You see, lately I have been cooking a lot by myself. Except for pasta... my mom still insists on straining it. People tell me I'm pretty good (Thanks, Cuz <3 and mummy!!) and I still am improving. 

Secretly, I want to be an Anthropologist who moonlights as a chef that specializes in patries and works for Duff Goldman at Charm City Cakes. Also, I periodically go to Egypt, and cool places like that and immerse myself in the cuisine.